Chapter 5

“As important as last time? When you all got drunk on some garbage at Mason’s and jumped naked into the pool? What is wrong with you? You hate all that.”

“And for you? What matters to you, Jake?” Zack doesn’t let him go, and Finley admits:

“I don’t give a damn about that party, Baker! You think I want to watch those starting-lineup assholes act like they’re the major leagues? None of it is even remotely fun. But I’m sick of riding Hurley’s bench. It’s been going on forever.”

“See? A strong personality always knows how to say no and doesn’t depend on other people’s opinions.”

“I just explained!”

Zachary isn’t exactly scrawny. If he got his East Asian features from his mother, he got solid shoulders and a good build from his father. And even if he isn’t as athletic as Sean, he boldly leans toward Jake.

“Are you saying any of them can change your future?” He indicates Renton’s crowd with his eyes. “Those idiots can decide for you whether you’ll be a good goalie? Hey, how, dude? Not one of them has anything close to Coach Hurley’s authority. And even Hurley doesn’t have the right to take away your chance to become whoever you want.”

“I know! So what do you suggest, smart guy?”

The guys exhale and straighten their backs again, still looking at each other across the table.

“Point one of S.P. self-development says: ‘Do everything possible to achieve your chosen goal.’”

“Like hell that depends on me!”

“Point number two: ‘Don’t back down from difficult tasks.’ And three: ‘Always control your emotions,’” Zachary continues calmly. “Self-control is a sign of intelligence, Finley. The higher it is, the fewer mistakes you make. Want to argue with me?”

“No, keep going. I want to see how deep you are in this, dude.”

“Deep enough to understand that I want to acknowledge my mistakes.”

“And why would you need that?” Jake snorts, but not as confidently now. “Going to repent for your sins? I thought people went to church for that.”

“Because it’s the evolution of personal growth,” Zack parries. “Weak people always justify themselves and blame other people for their failures. Only strong people can take responsibility. I’m sure you have strength in you, Jake. Now you just need to learn how to accept wins and losses, and stop trying to impress someone just because that ‘someone’ seems more successful than you.”

“What I have in me is the potential to become a damn robot!” Jake disagrees. “Go on, say something about selflessness too, Captain America, and the holy-man puzzle will be complete.”

“It won’t. An S.P. always defends their values and their interests. Always, Finley. I already told you about boundaries. Think about whether Renton’s party is worth a fight with Trisha. Tomorrow, a giant meteorite could fall on our town, and in the last second of your life, crushed under a rock, you won’t be regretting the stupid party you missed. You’ll regret not wishing your girlfriend good night.”

We all open our mouths and freeze for a moment, after which Jake exhales without any real malice, knowing he has lost:

“Damn, sometimes I hate you, Baker. You have a talent for slicing people’s brains open.”

“You know, Zack,” I turn my head toward my boss and say unexpectedly, “I think I’d join your strong-personality club. I liked point number two: don’t back down from difficulties.”

“Me too,” Amber agrees, looking at Baker with admiration. “Seriously, Zack, let’s start our own S.P. league. Or at least a secret society. We already have an ideological founder—you! Now we just need followers.”

“Why secret?” Trisha asks. She has already managed to get offended at Jake and is removing his hand from her waist. “By the way, guys, I’m with you too. I like the idea of developing the highest function of reason. When a meteorite falls on our town—if it falls, of course—I definitely want to be with the people I care about. So there.”

“Come on, Tri-ish. What are you doing?” Jake drawls guiltily and moves closer to his girlfriend. “I won’t go to that party. Say thank you to Mr. Smart Guy. We’ll say he convinced me.”

He flashes an angry black look at Zachary, but Zachary only shrugs and goes back to his chicken and salad. After dealing with a couple of nuggets, he asks Amber in turn:

“Yeah, why secret?”

“You people are so slow. Because it sounds interesting and mysterious. Almost like the Order of the Phoenix or the Knights Templar. I can already see the first secret meeting of our brotherhood and the oath of loyalty!”

Overcome with emotion, Amber tosses her pink braids back and bounces on the bench.

“It absolutely has to happen under a full moon! Do you agree?”

Amber is the most restless of us, and Zachary is the most serious, but even he smiles. He glances at her, looks past her, and suddenly thinks about something for a long minute.

We don’t even notice that the voices around us have gone quiet and that a tall, dark-haired guy has appeared in the school courtyard. His arrival makes Renton and Kate’s group fall silent and tense up, as if they’ve seen a dangerous stranger in front of them.

Strange, but it doesn’t look like Palmer has any friends among them.

Or maybe he doesn’t want to notice anyone himself.

After sweeping his gaze over the courtyard full of upperclassmen, he doesn’t look at anyone else. He has a lunch box in one hand, and the other is hooked over his backpack strap. He walks between the central tables with the same aim and confidence he had in class and stops a few yards from our group. Taking his backpack off his shoulder, he sits at an empty table, opens his lunch box, and starts eating, clearly not planning to stare around or satisfy anyone’s curiosity by talking.

I don’t know what exactly makes me freeze again when he appears. The fact that I’m seeing him here, in the senior class at school, after my father personally drove him to the police station. Or the fact that Sean isn’t the only one who matured over the summer. Matthew changed over these few months too.

My photographer’s eye makes me notice details precisely and compare them with the original data stored in my memory. And if Sean has put on a few pounds, Palmer has stayed just as lithe, only his shoulders have broadened and the cheekbones in his face are sharper. His strength and speed have definitely stayed with him too.

I’ve watched the lacrosse guys play many times, and I understand that if those two end up clashing on the same team after everything, it won’t be simple rivalry. And it definitely won’t be easy for Renton. Because Palmer has a backbone, plus a reputation as the kind of guy you’re better off not hanging around if you don’t want to end up on the wrong side of the law.

Amber practically says my thoughts out loud:

“I wonder how quickly Kate will lose interest in her new boyfriend and switch to Matthew, now that he’s back at school. I think Renton will bore her in a month. Rich girls like playing with fire until they get burned. And Kate is definitely not the smartest of them.”