Chapter 7

- Yes, - I admit. - It is true. I was performing at city hall with the school ensemble and waiting for Alex, but he did not come. When the police reported a terrible accident on Mile Road, I did not want to believe it. It could not be true! And then several weeks dropped out of my memory... I remember almost nothing from that time, but I know one thing: Alex always did what he promised. And he would definitely have come if someone had not delayed him on the way!

The pause is what I need to hold his gaze and swallow the lump in my throat.

- He was going to me, and he ended up with you.

- Shut up! - the dark-blue eyes flash with ice. - You know nothing!

- Then tell me! Why weren't you at his funeral? He loved you, and you ran away! You were gone for months, and then you show up in his hoodie and want me not to look. Not to notice!

Wright's hand is on me in an instant--before I can finish speaking. Strong fingers squeeze my shoulder until it hurts, but I am ready to bear pain far worse than that, if only I can learn the answer.

- Tell me, - I ask more quietly. - Please.

Carter's eyes close again, and his tense nostrils pull in air greedily.

- Move away, Holt, - he whispers, but he might as well have shouted; there is no difference. It is still like a slap. - Or I will shove you away, I swear!

- I cannot. You are holding me.

- Carter!

- What? - I do not understand.

- Say my name! I want you to know who is in front of you!

- Listen, I never forgot...

Wright's eyes fly open, even darker than before. He shakes me, lifting me easily off the floor, and drives me back against the wall. He looms over me, uncontrollable with the rage splashing inside him, and his hands make me frightened and hurt.

- For fuck's sake, Holt! Just say it! Otherwise I will decide you are expecting something from me, and I will give it to you. Come on!

I cannot answer; my throat feels locked in ice. I can only look at him, but through the bitter film even that is unbearable, and now it is my turn to close my eyes, to escape his hatred. Let it be.

- Say it! - he demands, and when I do not answer, he pins me to the wall with his chest. He lowers his head and suddenly presses his mouth furiously to my parted lips. Jerking up my skirt, he clamps a hand around my buttock and drives his hard hips into mine while I freeze in horror under his assault.

This kiss is not even close to the kiss Alex and I shared. It is not tenderness at all; it is punishment, and I try to pull away. At last I come back to life and struggle under Wright like a bird in a snare; I try to break free, but he holds me tightly. He crushes his mouth against mine until it hurts. And it probably hurts him too.

And I cannot breathe.

- You are insane!

- Say it!

- C-Carter... Carter! Carter! - I shout, and sob, unable to hold back the tears spilling out. - You are not Alex! - I cover my face with my hands. - Not him...

Wright finally lets me go and stumbles back himself, as if plague-stricken. Looking around, he shoves back the hair that has fallen in dark strands over his forehead and lets out a crude curse completely unacceptable within school walls. He rushes between the rows of desks for his bag and snatches it off the desk with a jerk.

At that moment the classroom door opens, and I see my stepbrother.

In his lacrosse uniform, Nicholas fills the doorway and calls to his friend:

- Wright, dude, where the hell did you disappear to?! Hurley is tearing the locker room apart! We are supposed to introduce the updated team roster to the school today, and you vanished. Nice timing! Found a moment to make out with a girl in here...

Nicholas suddenly sees me and falls silent, his face changing. First the smirk disappears from his lips, and then he draws his brows together in confusion, glancing at his friend in surprise:

- Hey, Wright? What the hell is going on here?

But Carter is already striding past him into the hall, shoving him with his shoulder in the doorway.

- Back off, Holt! If you want to talk, we will talk outside.